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It Was So Cold...
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Chilly Weather Reports

  1. It was so cold...
    we moved the outhouse inside.

  2. It was so cold...
    the snowblower had more kilometers on it than our car.

  3. It was so cold...
    I had to learned to swim by pretending. I hope I never have to pretend to drown.

  4. It was so cold...
    Dad's tailor made him a pin-striped caribou suit.

  5. It was so cold...
    people showed up at formal occasions in bearskin tuxedos.

  6. It was so cold...
    some men were starting to think that flannel nightgowns and woolly socks were sexy. Oo-la-la!

  7. It was so cold...
    chains wrapped around boots became the lastest fashion trend.

  8. It was so cold...
    planning to go outside was as much work as planning a two week vacation.

  9. It was so cold...
    every tennis racket in town was strapped to a foot.

  10. It was so cold...
    turkeys were stuffing bread crumbs under their wings and clamoring to be first in the oven.

  11. It was so cold...
    Scotmen were wearing down-filled kilts.

  12. It was so cold...
    Sikhs were wearing fur turbans.

    Links to COLD PLACES!

  13. It was so cold...
    when the sap stopped flowing in the trees, Dad felt his pulse and shouted "We're next!" (Get ready to rake up the hair.)

  14. It was so cold...
    EVERYONE had popsicle toes.

  15. It was so cold...
    the dog refused to go outside. There were no "accidents" on the carpet, but it gained six kilos and its eyes turned yellow.

  16. It was so cold...
    driving cars with frozen square tires caused so much vibration that we made a bundle checking the seats of taxis for spare change.

  17. It was so cold...
    Dad used tabasco sauce as aftershave lotion - just to get some feeling in his face.

  18. It was so cold...
    we tried to warm our fingers by chomping on chili peppers and breathing on our hands.

  19. It was so cold...
    as demand for hot things increased, Mexican food quadrupled in price.

  20. It was so cold...
    people were smoking Sterno cigarettes. Several people with beards went up in flames.

  21. It was so cold...
    we didn't even worry about hypothermia - cryonics was what you had to watch out for!

  22. It was so cold...
    in desperate attempts to get more down into their clothing, people were stuffing live geese under their coats.

  23. It was so cold...
    kids took make-believe to a whole new level - they just pretended to go outside and play.

  24. It was so cold . . .
    everyone was afraid to fall asleep - you might not wake up until 2092.

  25. It was so cold...
    our "dream house" was anything with a frost-free interior.

It Was So Cold...
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