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It Was So Cold...
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Chilly Weather Reports

  1. It was so cold...
    if you baked a cake, all you had to do was set it in the window. Two minutes later it was frosted!

  2. It was so cold...
    if the thermometer had been just a little longer - we would have been goners!

  3. It was so cold...
    I tried to take the garbage out - but it didn't want to go!

  4. It was so cold...
    I thought I had a stone rattling around in my boot - it turned out to be one of my toes!

  5. It was so cold...
    the pet store was only selling seals and penguins.

  6. It was so cold...
    mailmen didn't worry about dogs anymore - it was the abominable snowmen that were keeping them from their appointed rounds!

  7. It was so cold...
    if the Statue of Liberty was here, she'd be sticking that torch under her robe.

  8. It was so cold...
    when we went to build a fire, we had to defrost the fireplace first.

  9. It was so cold...
    it took me two hours to walk one block - my shadow kept freezing to the sidewalk!

  10. It was so cold...
    I traded in my pillow for a griddle!

  11. It was so cold...
    my car wouldn't run - but my nose wouldn't stop!

    Play the Game!
    Play the Game!
    Play the Game!

  12. It was so cold...
    Shania Twain had to cover her midriff. Record sales plummet!

  13. It was so cold...
    city council voted to weatherstrip the city limits.

  14. It was so cold...
    they had to close the bar at that ice hotel in Sweden - patrons couldn't get the chunks of vodka out of the glasses!

  15. It was so cold...
    the flame froze on the candle, so I threw it outside. When it thawed out in the spring, it started a forest fire!

  16. It was so cold...
    airplanes needed icebreakers to clear a path through the sky!

  17. It was so cold...
    you could tell how hard someone had been crying by the length of the icicles on their cheeks.

  18. It was so cold...
    the lights would only go on in the house if we opened the door.

  19. It was so cold...
    birds were inviting extra furry cats into their nests.

  20. It was so cold...
    people had swirly marks all over their faces from getting too close to those electric stove elements!

  21. It was so cold...
    parents were actually encouraging their kids to play with matches!
    And then...

  22. It was so cold...
    firemen couldn't convince people to get out of their houses when they caught fire!

  23. It was so cold...
    the stupid cat got its whiskers frozen in the birdbath.

  24. It was so cold...
    all game hunting was suspended due to dangerous conditions - bullets were shivering so hard they were veering off course!

  25. It was so cold...
    people were walking around bug-eyed. If you blinked, your eyes froze shut!


It Was So Cold...
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